You’re Not Inconsistent. You’re Unanchored.
Why missing a day with God doesn’t mean what you might think it means
Can I tell you about a conversation I’ve had with myself more times than I can count?
Me: Rach, I know you love God. But why can’t you stay consistent with spending time with Him? C’mon, get it together 😐.
Also Me: Gurl, I know, right? I do great for, like, a week, okay maybe a few days, but then life gets to life-in’ and takes over 😩.
I miss a day that becomes a week that becomes a month.
Enter guilt. Ugh, God must be so disappointed in me.
I know, stinkin’ thinkin’, right?
🎶Hold up, wait a minute 🎶
Let’s replace that lie with Truth.
You’re not inconsistent because something is wrong with you. You’re not lazy or being a bad Christian.
And God is not standing over you with His arms crossed, counting your missed days.
You’re just unanchored. And that’s a different problem with a different solution.
The lie behind guilt
Okay, so you miss a day, and you hear a quiet voice: See? You can’t even do this. Other women manage it way better than you. You always start things and NE-VER finish them.
So you try to come back with more effort. A better plan. A thicker devotional book, a prettier newer journal, a concise reading schedule. Even some Bible journaling pens.
And it works, for a little while, until life happens again.
Because life always happens.
Then the voice comes back louder, and this time it’s got evidence.
If you read my last letter, you know that my past had some very hard years. My life felt like a constant emergency, and some days opening my Bible felt like lifting a car. Every day I missed spending time with God added another layer of shame, until the shame itself became the thing standing between me and my time with Him.
The enemy’s favorite trick is not getting us to skip a day. It’s using yesterday’s missed day to steal today’s.
It’s using guilt to believe the lie that you’re inconsistent, therefore incompetent, to maintain a healthy relationship with God.
Don’t believe the lie!
Missing a day is not failure. It’s just…a missed day 💁🏻♀️.
Scripture says God’s mercies “are new every morning” (Lamentations 3:23 ESV). Not new every morning for women with streaks. New every morning, period.
Besides, your consistency was never the condition of His nearness in the first place.
He was, is, and always will be, there.
What willpower doesn’t fix
Here’s a shift that changed things for me: consistency doesn’t come from sheer willpower. It comes from being anchored.
Think about the seasons when you were consistent with God. It wasn’t because your willpower was stronger that month. It was more likely due to something holding you in place. A rhythm. A time. A reason that ran deeper than “I should do this.”
The writer of Hebrews describes our hope through Christ as “a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul” (Hebrews 6:19 ESV).
An anchor doesn’t work by effort. A boat doesn’t strain to stay in place. The anchor holds, and the boat simply stays attached to it.
That’s the difference between the woman who struggles through her quiet time and the woman who has a lifeline. The first is relying on herself. The second has dropped an anchor. And even when the waves come, and they will come, she drifts less far and returns faster.
So the question is not, “How do I try harder?”
The question is, “Where is my anchor?”
An anchor that helps me
I want to give you a simple practice to help anchor your spirit to His so you can show up consistently in your moments with God.
Tomorrow, before the day gets loud and busy, grab your Bible and find a spot. A chair, a corner, the edge of your bed. Put your phone on Do Not Disturb. Take one slow breath.
And say: “God, I’m here.”
That’s your anchor point.
Not “God, I’m sorry it’s been so long.” Not “God, I promise I’ll do better this time,” or “Hi, remember me 🫣?”
Just: I’m here.
Because His promise is not “perform for me and I might show up.” His promise is “Draw near to Me, and I will draw near to you.” Every time you say, “God, I’m here,” He keeps that promise.
Even if it’s been three days. Even if it’s been three years.
From there, bring your number one greatest concern to Him. And try not to say it the way you think He should hear it. Don’t mask your concern with “faith-speak.”
Say it as your real, raw self because He already knows how you feel about it and wants the real you to show up.
Then ask three things:
Lord, what is the lie that I’m believing? What truth do you want me to know? What do you want me to do in response to this truth?
Sit for a minute or two. Listen. Open your Bible and read a verse or two. Could be your favorite verse, one from Sunday’s sermon, or just open up and read.
Eventually, this practice can grow into much more. But the size of the practice is not the point. The nearness is.
Start smaller than you think you should
If you take one thing from this letter, take this: the woman who shows up imperfectly every day will be transformed more deeply than the woman waiting for the perfect season to start.
So don’t build a monument this week. Drop an anchor.
Pick your spot. Pick your time. Start with three words.
And when you miss a day, because at some point you will, remember that His mercies are new every morning. You don’t restart from zero. You just come back to the anchor.
And you’ll find He never moved.
God, I’m here.
He is. And He’s so glad you came.
With love and faith,
Rachel ⚓️
Tell me in the comments or hit reply: where’s your spot going to be? Naming it makes it real. Praying for you!